This is about my journey navigating through life masking childhood trauma and addiction as well as the challenges of being on the spectrum. I was struck by lightning in 1968, aged 7, and felt sure that had some impact on my neurology contributing to who I am. Following my path that attempts to face my issues and looking for ways to return to health through various healing modalities and spiritual search to discover who I truly am. After a decade of living and working in different communities working and traveling doing a wide range of occupations including voluntary work and care work amongst many others, my search took me to the Findhorn Community in the Northeast of Scotland. After a series of difficult personal events in my mid-20s that changed my life and began my search I took up running age 46 then Ultramarathon running as a therapeutic response to my addictions and competed in the UKs longest Ultramarathons. The journey takes us through my own health challenges exploring ways of healing my deep-rooted ancestral patterns and allowing my creative expression in a wide range of craft and music and physical pursuits like yoga and Ultra running.